Home...there's no place like it. It's the place where my children throw their toys in the foyer, knock over their drink and wipe up half of it, placing a towel over the area so that no one will slip on it, and where the toddlers scream and leave fingerprints pretty much everywhere.
Okay so it's not a perfect home but it's home. Sometimes, when it's quiet, i think about all of the in things that make my home a "home" and I'm convinced that there's nothing like it. I miss the noise. I miss the sticky little fingers, and I definitely couldn't begin to imagine how much I'd miss those sweet little hugs and kisses that I always get from my little ones. If it were any different, it wouldn't be home.
Showing posts with label Home. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Home. Show all posts
Friday, April 12, 2013
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
My Position on Staying at Home
My post,"SAHM Movement Rocks Feminism" seemed to get some interesting feedback so I thought I'd take a moment to clarify some things. I'm not, by any means, affiliated with any movement that looks down on people who choose not to stay at home. In fact, it appears that the more I have defended the position of choosing home as a necessary place of employment, the more there seems to be a rebellion against it.
I find it pretty sad that where it was once considered a normal thing for a woman to be employed by her home, to begin her day with an early rise with a mind to keep to her household schedule, to tend her little ones during the day and prepare her home for her husband's arrival is now considered stone aged and unrealistic. My position is by no means puffed up with pride. However, I come from a place where I've experienced the verbal sarcasms and even the downplay of the position that I've chosen at home, and I find it to be degrading. Therefore, although you may sense the strong feeling on the subject, my posts reflect my position of defense for those of us who do chose home as a place of employment.
I speak of my job as a homemaker very highly because I believe that it's God's calling and I embrace the high calling of God to be a keeper of my home. With that, I eagerly welcome and encourage others to experience the joy that comes with being employed at home rather than choosing to bash those of us who choose to by deeming us unintelligent and worthless. I think that anyone who loves their job tends to speak about it with passion but I would never tell someone that they're sinning if they're not a stay at home mom. I just understand that we live in a society where things that God looks highly upon are minimized and those things that are abominable to Him are glorified by people, and this is my opportunity, a place to speak on my beliefs about that.
I'm not standing in judgment of anyone here but I do have strong opinions on feminism. So in my posts, I may mention some of the things that we as Christian women have allowed into our hearts as a compromise between godliness and feminism but it is solely one's own convictions that will determine what they do with that. The one thing I will definitely state is that any woman who has questions about what God wants for her that she should, indeed, seek the word of God and allow Him to reveal His individual plan for her.
I find it pretty sad that where it was once considered a normal thing for a woman to be employed by her home, to begin her day with an early rise with a mind to keep to her household schedule, to tend her little ones during the day and prepare her home for her husband's arrival is now considered stone aged and unrealistic. My position is by no means puffed up with pride. However, I come from a place where I've experienced the verbal sarcasms and even the downplay of the position that I've chosen at home, and I find it to be degrading. Therefore, although you may sense the strong feeling on the subject, my posts reflect my position of defense for those of us who do chose home as a place of employment.
I speak of my job as a homemaker very highly because I believe that it's God's calling and I embrace the high calling of God to be a keeper of my home. With that, I eagerly welcome and encourage others to experience the joy that comes with being employed at home rather than choosing to bash those of us who choose to by deeming us unintelligent and worthless. I think that anyone who loves their job tends to speak about it with passion but I would never tell someone that they're sinning if they're not a stay at home mom. I just understand that we live in a society where things that God looks highly upon are minimized and those things that are abominable to Him are glorified by people, and this is my opportunity, a place to speak on my beliefs about that.
I'm not standing in judgment of anyone here but I do have strong opinions on feminism. So in my posts, I may mention some of the things that we as Christian women have allowed into our hearts as a compromise between godliness and feminism but it is solely one's own convictions that will determine what they do with that. The one thing I will definitely state is that any woman who has questions about what God wants for her that she should, indeed, seek the word of God and allow Him to reveal His individual plan for her.
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Home Expectations - Do They Help or Hinder a Healthy Home?
Homes are all different yet one thing that I believe every home shares is expectations. What our expectations are can help or hinder a healthy home, free from unnecessary stress and burden. Whether we expect that work take precedence to play or the reverse, expectations can give our home a flavor of peace or turmoil. Setting goals based on reasonable expectations can help us achieve the peaceful home we all yearn for.
I find that in my own home, the things that have caused me the most stress have been when I'm engaged in something and I have to stop to do something else or when I walk into a messy family room and the children are lounging around in it as though they don't see the mess. These are just a couple of tickers that get me going. Next thing you know I'm frustrated, the children feel my frustration through the change in my countenance, and my home has changed from a place of peace to a place where strife begins to rise up in the behavior and attitudes of my children. The question I've had to ask myself is, "What is most important?"
In my home, I'd rather have peace than strife and to achieve that sense of peace, I have to check the importance of my expectations. I expect that none of the children sit in a messy room. I realize that in a family of 11, it's expected that home will not be immaculate; however, a sense of tidiness is expected so that we're not all tripping over toys and other objects that are either carelessly thrown or have fallen on the floor. So to translate my expectation to my children, we've made a rule that they are only permitted to sit in a room to relax, read, or watch a video if that room is tidied. Tidiness of a room to me means that the room doesn't have toys or other items on the floor and that the sofa is clear for anyone to sit on it. So the goal is to have the children take the responsibility for picking up and putting away all items immediately after they use them as well as enforce what I believe is a very basic rule, which is if you knock it down or drop it, pick it up. This goal helps me to achieve the expectation of a tidy room without frustration and furthers the main goal of peace.
I also expect that my children follow all instruction without complaining in tone, words, or body language. There is a time to work and a time to play. Work is a part of life and to complain about it is to not only complain against parental authority but also to complain against God. Therefore I expect my children to work cheerfully so that they can unwind and play as a reward for their effort. To achieve this, there is a consequence of additional work for whomever complains about an instruction or task. Some times that means they'll miss out on part of a movie or other family activity because they have extra work.
I've found that consistency with keeping my expectations reasonable, setting goals to achieve my expectations, and enforcing appropriate consequences have really helped to create a more peaceful home, and I'm certain that the character that results from these things is something that the children will be able to carry with them well into their future.
I find that in my own home, the things that have caused me the most stress have been when I'm engaged in something and I have to stop to do something else or when I walk into a messy family room and the children are lounging around in it as though they don't see the mess. These are just a couple of tickers that get me going. Next thing you know I'm frustrated, the children feel my frustration through the change in my countenance, and my home has changed from a place of peace to a place where strife begins to rise up in the behavior and attitudes of my children. The question I've had to ask myself is, "What is most important?"
In my home, I'd rather have peace than strife and to achieve that sense of peace, I have to check the importance of my expectations. I expect that none of the children sit in a messy room. I realize that in a family of 11, it's expected that home will not be immaculate; however, a sense of tidiness is expected so that we're not all tripping over toys and other objects that are either carelessly thrown or have fallen on the floor. So to translate my expectation to my children, we've made a rule that they are only permitted to sit in a room to relax, read, or watch a video if that room is tidied. Tidiness of a room to me means that the room doesn't have toys or other items on the floor and that the sofa is clear for anyone to sit on it. So the goal is to have the children take the responsibility for picking up and putting away all items immediately after they use them as well as enforce what I believe is a very basic rule, which is if you knock it down or drop it, pick it up. This goal helps me to achieve the expectation of a tidy room without frustration and furthers the main goal of peace.I also expect that my children follow all instruction without complaining in tone, words, or body language. There is a time to work and a time to play. Work is a part of life and to complain about it is to not only complain against parental authority but also to complain against God. Therefore I expect my children to work cheerfully so that they can unwind and play as a reward for their effort. To achieve this, there is a consequence of additional work for whomever complains about an instruction or task. Some times that means they'll miss out on part of a movie or other family activity because they have extra work.
I've found that consistency with keeping my expectations reasonable, setting goals to achieve my expectations, and enforcing appropriate consequences have really helped to create a more peaceful home, and I'm certain that the character that results from these things is something that the children will be able to carry with them well into their future.
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